Review – Sort of – Joann

I was going to write this bitterly nasty review of Joann and my search for natural fibers today, but I am not really feeling bitterly nasty. I guess I am a little out of sorts since I started the exercise/reduced eating thing.

All I wanted was an emerald green linen, but there were none to be had. What I really want is the glory days of my mom’s Hancock Fabrics in San Antonio. The way I remember, the fabric was all displayed on those round cascading thingies and every table was a single kind of fabric in an array of solids. There was a magic quarter of the store that was all wedding fabric. I was not allowed to set foot in that part of the store. In my recollection, all the fabric was wonderful natural fibers in gorgeous colors, but it was the 70s, so I am probably engaged in revisionist history. Whatever. That’s what I want. And I want all the fabric to be 3 yards for a nickel.

Anyway, I was in Joann all pissed and storming past the giant isle of silky prints and the giant isle of team fleece and the giant isle of flannel, when it occurred to me that I could just dye my own linen. So I picked out a midweight linen and a packet of dye. The good dye. Not RIT. I am bummed because the fabric probably won’t end up with the sheen I was looking for, but I got the color I wanted, and there’s always spray starch. I am on this kick where I am obsessed with the colors that were in a crayola 8 pack. Bright green, bright blue, yellow, orange. Yummy.

Sorry to any readers. No pics makes a boring post. This is mostly for me anyway.

Adele P. Margolis – My Hero

The first thing Margolis tells you in How to Make Clothes that Fit and Flatter is that it is a heck of a lot easier to make something look good if you’re not all bulgy in odd places. She recommends that before you sink a boatload of time into tailoring you should skip a few cocktails and put the pork chops down. Her last words on the subject: if returning to the super-hotty physique of yore seems impossible, at least “try for ten.”

Heck yeah! Off to the gym.


See, it’s good for you to be slender. She is 97 in this pic. Me-oW!

Dear Professional Mentor,

I write here because I cannot let you know that instead of coming home and cutting out and sewing the foundation for the wedding dress I promised to make you, I played solitaire and fell asleep with my puppies.
I could not help it. I are a large lunch, my internet went down and the puppies were so very very sleepy. And I am scared.
I have sewn for myself, but I have never sewn for anyone else. Sewing for others is really stressful. You, however, are exceptional. You are my mentor. Everything that I do as a teacher that is good is inspired by you, so sewing for you is a joy and a pleasure. I think I can kick this dress’ ass and give you exactly what you deserve. I can do this, but sometimes I sputter at the very beginning, and at the very end.
So this private letter is going into my blog that no one reads right now and that you could never find. I am scared. I wish I could tell you, but you are the bride.
Off I go!

-Scared Mentee

Snake Bit

Today I ate everything.

My sewing machine died.

They moved the goodwill i took a ton of stuff to.

They were out of stock on the weedwacker I tried to replace.

A cloud of angry insects swarmed when we tried to take a picture of a skirt I made.

I unplugged the computer with my toes. Accidentally.


I figure if I was destoying everything I touch I should do some demo. Then I realized I was chiseling away at asbestos tile.

Daily Mah Jong: 192/920

Finally some stuff…


Total calories so far: 330+250=580+1040+300=1920ish

Daily Mah Jong rank: 60/617

Today ended up being pretty lame. I almost burned up dinner twice, my machine snarled a couple times on button holes.

No pics.

A bad day.

Ding Dong…

The year has ended. I am off for the summer. I am getting a new room next year and the old one is empty. My yearbook is signed. My finals are graded. The end.

I am only going to be attacking two projects for the first month of summer. If I tackle anything else, shame on me:

1. Untitled SWAP
2. Wedding dress for dear friend.

I am going to go sleep for three days…